A Gang of Eleven

May 6, 20162 Comments

Me and my sponsor child Ericka. We are reading a book that she made for me.

On a recent visit to El Salvador, I learned that gangs are a huge problem in the city of San Salvador. I also learned that children living in poverty are prime targets to be recruited into gangs and sometimes parents will send their children off to school and they never return home because they have been recruited by a gang.

Something else I learned while in El Salvador is that a gang will not recruit someone if they are a Christian. There are parents who will put their child in Compassion’s program to try to help keep them out of gangs. Gang members will even put their own children in the program to keep them safe.

Children go to the Compassion project, learn about Jesus, and bring home what they learn to their family members. Some parents who were gang members have become Christians and left gangs.

Because of the gang problem in El Salvador, I have started a campaign to try to help children in the country who are waiting for sponsors. Wouldn’t it be awesome to see as many of them as possible to be free from the violence that could await them in a gang? Also with a sponsor to share the love of Christ with them they also will know just how truly special they are!

My new campaign can be found at this link -> A Gang of Eleven.

Please take just a few minutes of your time to check out my page and say a prayer for the children on the page.

Also, if you have a facebook, twitter or any sort of place that you can share the link, please please please share it.

Thanks so much for reading and also thank you for your prayers!

In case you missed the link here it is again – A Gang of Eleven

Have a great weekend!

Trusting is Believing, My One Word for 2016

January 2, 201612 Comments

In 2009 Compassion started a tradition that focused on one word for the year. Two weeks ago I received a blog writing prompt that encouraged me to spend time with the Lord and ask for his guidance as to what word he would choose for me in the coming new year. Though I have never really chosen a word in advance usually by the end of each year I find that there was a particular theme that my year seemed to have taken on as the year progressed.

Even though I have not chosen a word for this year I do know without a doubt my theme and word for 2015 was ‘TRUST’

As 2015 started I began the year with a whole lot of new things on my plate. Now as I look back I can see I had many more things coming my way that I really had no idea were going to be coming. All of those things made way for a whole lot of times I found myself having to Trust the Lord in his guidance and his strength.

There were also many times this past year that He showed me that big things can happen if I just let go of myself and put ALL of my trust in him.

With that said now I will say this has probably been the hardest year in my Christian journey.

I started the year off full of excitement and ready to dive right in to whatever God had in store. But as the year progressed things seemed to get more and more confusing and I will admit it there were times I felt like he was far away, and also sometimes oddly silent.

At one point even though I knew God had led me in to the place I was, things didn’t seem to be going quite as well as I thought they would have been going. I also had conflict going on around me and many times found myself feeling as if I was caught in the middle and for some reason I began to feel as if somehow I was to blame for it. I know now it wasn’t my problem or my fault and also know I did not put myself in the middle of it at all. I can’t really go into detail here but will say that by the end of April my confidence in trusting to what and to where God was leading me was beginning to fall apart. Yet at the same time, he still kept showing time and time again that I was where he wanted me to be.

In April I went on a mission trip to Haiti. While I was there it was really good yet at the same time I had probably one of my worst times ever of feeling like I had somehow messed up and had heard God’s plan in this for me all wrong. Strangely even though I felt that way, at the very same time things happened while I was there that soon proved to me I was actually right where God wanted me to be….Ya I know it sounds totally confusing and weird. It’s a very long story I could never put into words, so I will just say as I now reflect back I can see God’s hand prints all over the place on that trip but at the same time it’s like the enemy somehow was able to distort my vision part of the time that I was there and make me feel really confused. Another thing that happened while on that trip is I was notified that a really close friend of mine had died and I kept a lot of my emotions about her death bottled up until I returned back home. I also think maybe the sadness I felt about her dying may have put a bit of a dark cloud over the trip too. I remember coming home knowing that I was supposed to have been on that trip yet also at the same time feeling even more discouraged.

But here is the cool part….

What I didn’t know at the time was that just a week after returning home from that trip I was going to be invited on another trip. On April 23 I received an email inviting me to attend a vision trip in El Salvador with Compassion International. I know this may sound crazy but even though I was at that time doubting my confidence in discerning what was God and what wasn’t God I clearly heard him say to me “GO on the trip.”

So I signed up.

After I signed up for the trip my confidence still continued to plummet.

Yet God still kept throwing things out there that said I was in the right place but by then I was even more confused and feeling as if I was losing my ability to trust in what I heard from Him was really Him.

I also felt ashamed of my feelings and I didn’t want to tell anyone what was going on so I spiraled through most of it feeling very alone.

Then to top off all those bad feelings in July I started having some serious knee issues and I realized I most likely would not be able to go on the El Salvador trip.

I sent an email to the trip leader explaining to her the situation and I told her that I would not be able to go on the trip. I knew from past experience of going on a trip like this that I may have to walk in places that I couldn’t walk such as rough terrain or long periods of walking which I knew I could not do. I figured most likely they wouldn’t let me go with my knees like they were anyway.

Once again I found myself doubting and I began to tell myself that maybe I had made the decision to go in the first place because I had most likely heard God’s voice wrong. Why would God tell me to sign up for something He knew I wasn’t going to be able to do?

After I sent the email I soon received a reply and a phone call from the trip leader. During the phone call we talked about a lot of things, including the fact that I could possibly have another trip coming up with my church to Haiti, (I forgot to mention that earlier) that I worried if happened the dates may conflict. As we spoke I began to feel as if she was someone I had known forever even though it was my first time ever talking to her by phone. She told me that the trip would not be very physical and that I could still go with the knee problem if I wanted to. She also prayed with me for discernment I would be able to know what God wanted me to do.

We ended the conversation with me having a few more days to pray about my decision which I did and soon I knew without a doubt that God still wanted me to go to El Salvador!

So once again I said, “yes.”

I felt such relief once I made that decision and then suddenly at the end of July I found out that I would have the trip to Haiti but it was not going to be anywhere near the El Salvador trip dates. It was so exciting to know God had worked out the dates!!

But suddenly I had another problem… There was no way I could afford to pay for a trip to El Salvador and also a trip to Haiti.

I felt a loyalty to my church, because I was the new Mission’s director plus I had been a part of setting this trip up. Suddenly I felt like I was torn between the two trips and found myself trying to choose once again. I knew if I was going to have to choose I had to choose my church because I felt a loyalty to our mission there. But God still said to do both! Once again I began struggled with God because I knew I did not have the money to pay for both of these trips!

I made a decision on my own even though deep down I knew God wanted me in both places. I decided I was going to drop the El Salvador trip and I even went so far as to tell a couple of people I would not be going to El Salvador anymore.

As soon as I made that decision suddenly I could not rest.

And God still kept saying, “GO to El Salvador!”

I knew God wanted me to trust him.

I also knew I still had to go on that trip.

I changed my mind and I said, “OKAY, I will go!” but this time I did it differently and I finally gave up my own feelings on the matter. This time placed it back into God’s hands where it belonged; And guess what happened the very next day???? I found out I would not have to pay for my trip to Haiti! Wow! All I had to do was say yes and what I thought was going to be a problem was never a problem at all. God had everything under control!

I know this story is getting really long so if you are still here thank you for hanging in there. I will now try my best to finish this as quickly as possible.

We will fast forward to September….

Since July things had been going really great but then two days before I was supposed to leave for El Salvador something horrible happened. I cannot say much about what happened here because I always try really hard not to put things on the blog that may tell something personal and could possible hurt others. What I will say is that what happened totally threw me for a loop and almost threw me back into my mode of not trusting my ability to truly know what God wanted me to do. I spent the whole next day and night in tears, doubting who I was now and for that matter also doubting who I had ever known myself to be. Its may sound crazy but sometimes old wounds can be opened and when they open you may find new ones you never even knew you had. In a matter of a couple of hours of time I went from feeling closer than I had ever been with God to suddenly feeling like a horrible person. At that point I wasn’t sure how on earth I would ever be able to get myself on that plane to El Salvador.

The day before the trip, I talked to God asking him if what had happened to make me feel that way was true?? I had searched my soul and honestly felt like what I had felt the day and night before was because of lies created by the enemy. But I still wanted and needed God’s input very much.

“Please just give me something to let me know I was truly where you wanted me to be!” I prayed.

As I prayed I opened my Bible and this is what I saw hi-lighted inside – Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her!” Luke 1:45 That caught my attention and as I recognized the rest of the story suddenly peace just wafted over me.

The next morning as my husband dropped me off at the airport I was still at peace and never one time did I ever find myself thinking that by going on this trip I was making a wrong decision.

A little while later shortly after the plane lifted off the ground I noticed the sun was rising. I remember trying my best to hold back the tears of joy because at that moment I knew like I’d never known anything before that I was exactly where God wanted me to be. I was so thankful that despite all the detours I had taken to get to this place he had never given up on me. I was so thankful that through all the mess I had said yes.

That trip ended up being one of the best times I have ever connected with God and while there he showed me I truly was exactly where he wanted me to be . Another thing about that trip was it was not just a vision trip it was also a spiritual retreat. I had never been on a spiritual retreat before and had no idea what a treat I was in for. Each evening we would all meet for a couple of hours and focus on knowing and just being with God. In the mornings we were encouraged to spend time with Him. we were encouraged to go where ever he took us by walking the grounds or sitting on our porches or whatever felt right. To just BE and connect with God was what we all seemed to do. Never in my life have I experienced something like the closeness I felt with him on that trip. The whole trip from start to finish was perfect. We were very busy yet at the same time it felt like it was the most relaxed time emotionally I ever remember having in my life. It was like God had taken the worst parts of me and my life away for that week.

Another cool thing is that just as the trip had begun with the dawning of a new day and a beautiful sunrise, my trips last leg was finished with my plane taking off from Houston on the journey home with the sun just setting and it was beautiful too. I felt as if I had somehow come full circle and I also knew without a doubt that another chapter of my life was now closing because a new one had just begun.

I knew from that moment on in order for me to do what I am supposed to do for God I had to fully get rid of myself and trust Him.

I also now knew that all the things that had seemed to be reasons for me not to go on the trip were actually all the more reason for me to Go.

Since the trip things have not always been easy but I do now know what God wants from me. I also knew I had to give up a few things that I felt like were getting in the way of what He wants me to do. Giving them up wasn’t easy but oddly once I made my decision and did what I know he wanted me to do I felt relieved and also that peaceful feeling once again.

So my word this past year was Trust

When I looked up the definition of trust it said – “the firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something. “relationships have to be built on trust.”

I also found this part of the definition interesting, looking at the word trust used as in law. – “confidence placed in a person by making that person the nominal owner of property to be held or used for the benefit of one or more – others.”

.As I started writing this blog post I had not looked up the definition of trust, though I knew what trust meant I hadn’t really ever thought of it that way. also as I started this post I had no idea what my word of 2016 would be. I had planned to stop this post with the definition of trust and tell you that I still had no idea what my word for 2016 was yet.

But as I read the definition from the perspective of setting up a ‘Trust’ I realized that another lesson I learned in El Salvador was from pastor Carlos when he talked about lending to the Lord (see blog post Casa de Pan Lending to the Lord) somehow seems to go with this definition. Suddenly it has occurred to me that though I place my confidence in God, he also has confidence in me and he has placed me where I am because that is where HE wants me to be. Could it be possible he has made me a nominal owner of HIS property, and now it is my job to use his property for the benefit of others?

As this revelation was flooding over me suddenly I looked up and saw a group of pictures hanging on the wall in my bedroom with the words Dream, Imagine, Love, Hope, Faith and Believe on them. The top word on the pictures is the word Believe. Now I can see that without believing He chose me I can never fully trust myself to do what he wants me to do.

I know God wants me to not only trust him but also to totally believe in his ability to make proper decisions and trust that he can and will make things go exactly as he has planned.

I plan to spend this year focusing on believing that God has my life in his hands and no matter what things may look like from the outside to me or anyone else, God knows the truth, he knows the plan and He is the only one I have to believe in.

I said in the beginning of this post that this has probably been one of my hardest years of my Christian journey. I also know, even though it has been a hard year, it has also been my best year on this journey so far.

I am pretty sure it was a good year.

Now I have a question for you.

Do you have a word you feel as if God has given you to focus on this year?

If so add your word to the comments or share your blog post in the link up below I would love to read it.

Thanks for reading my very long blog post and I wish you a blessed and wonderful new year!

P.S. Don’t forget to share your ‘One Word’ below.

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Baking Classes to Help Ericka Become a Chef – 12 Days of Giving Christmas Away

December 20, 20152 Comments

Today was Christmas cookie baking day at my house.

I started with M & M Cookies.

Then moved on to Peanut Blossoms.

And then for the big finish and my favorite, Fudge.

As I was baking I started thinking about my Compassion Sponsor child ‘Ericka’. This past September I had the opportunity to visit Ericka in El Salvador.

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The Moment we Met… Ericka and Me

Ericka and Me at the Water Park

Heraldo our interpretor, Ericka’s Father Salvador, Me, Ericka, and her Teacher

One of the things Ericka shared with me me during our visit is that she wants to be a Chef when she grows up.

The very next day after visiting Ericka we visited a Compassion project in San Salvador that had a baking class.

Children in Baking Class at a Compassion Project in San Salvador, El Salvador

In the baking class the children were learning how to cook, and that day they were making garlic bread loaves. We were all able to sample them and they were delicious!

The kids really seemed to enjoy the class and shared with us what they were learning and they told us they wanted to be chefs when they grew up.

By being in Compassion’s sponsorship program they were able to be a part of this class and they were learning a very valuable skill that would not only help them at home to safely prepare meals, but also would help them in the future as a job skill they would be able to use for creating and selling food in the market.

This was something I didn’t realize was available to the children and when I saw this I realized that what Ericka had said the day before about wanting to be a chef someday was actually a possibility and it was something she could learn right in her Compassion project!

How exciting is that?!!

So that brings me to today’s Giving Christmas Away gift – the gift of Baking Classes.

As you have just read, learning to cook can be very valuable gift for a child in poverty.

To give the gift of a Baking Class just click the picture below of the little girl in the apron and it will take you to the gifts page

She is one of the kids I met in the baking class in El Salvador, just look at that smile. She was one very joyful little girl 🙂

Thanks for reading and have a wonderful day!

Everyone Deserves a Fair Chance

October 27, 2015June 11, 20189 Comments

Squeals of delight echoed off the walls of our tiny concrete playground as we took our stance, lined up arm and arm, ready to guard the make believe goal behind us.

Our three year old opponent was in position eyeing us up, a look of determination on her face. With her tiny foot posed behind the lopsided pink ball, she counted, “Uno dos tres!” Suddenly the ball was sailing toward us and more squeals of delight erupted as the ball made its way through our legs and into goal. We all cheered as three year old Genesis jumped up and down, clapping her hands in sheer delight. “Score!!! Mine! Mine! Mine!” she said.

Her joy was contagious and we couldn’t help but join her in the celebration. There was so much to celebrate today because not only was Genesis winning in this game of soccer but she was also winning in life!

This was my second day El Salvador and that morning our group had visited a Compassion child survival program called “Little Friends of the King” and now this afternoon we were visiting three year old Genesis and her mother Vanessa who are part of that program.

In the area where Genesis was born the infant mortality rate is very high. Many babies never make it to birth and many who are born never make it to their first birthday. If Genesis’ mother ‘Vanessa’ had not been a part of the child survival program Genesis may have been very different from the child we were playing soccer with today.

Being in Compassion’s Child Survival Program helped Genesis’ mother to learn how to take care of herself and her baby during her pregnancy and after by giving her pregnancy coaching, medical care, and emotional, nutritional and spiritual guidance. Vanessa also learned how to care for Genesis after she was born and Genesis also receives medical checkups and her childhood immunizations.

The Child Survival Program also has vocational training such as cosmetology, jewelry making and sewing classes.

Vanessa showed us a sewing machine that was given to her by Compassion and she told us that at the CSP she was able to learn how to sew and she showed us clothing that she makes and sells in the market. Learning this valuable job skill has helped Vanessa to be able to support herself and her daughter financially.

It was very obvious how much being a part of this program has made a world difference in Vanessa and Genesis’ lives and has helped Genesis to develop into the healthy, bubbly little girl we were playing soccer with today.

Our game of soccer continued most of the afternoon with Genesis making the rules. We didn’t mind at all to be playing by the rules of a 3 year old because Genesis’ rules were fair (and also a lot of fun!). We all took turns playing each position. There were only two positions, you were either a Kicker or you were a Goalie and you clapped and cheered when anyone scored.

As each of us took our turn to kick the ball Genesis would place the ball on the spot where we would kick it from. When it was my turn to kick the ball, just as I was getting ready to kick, Genesis suddenly moved out of her goalie position, picked up the ball and moved it closer to the goal. We all laughed and then I took my turn kicking the ball from my new spot which was closer and gave me a better advantage of getting it in the goal.

I didn’t think too much about Genesis moving the ball closer to the goal at that time but now I have had a little more time to think about why Genesis may have decided to move the ball closer when it was my turn.

I have a knee problem which causes me not be able to walk or jump very well and though I never said anything about it to anyone, I think Genesis still may have noticed and I think maybe she didn’t want me to be at a disadvantage when it was my turn to kick the ball.

Something I noticed about Genesis’ game of soccer is that no matter which team we were on we were still all winners and we were all cheering each other on.

Because of the small space we were playing in, the goal was only about four feet away, but I am guessing that in the eyes of a three year old, four feet must look pretty far and when it was my turn to kick the ball Genesis made sure I would have a fair chance at getting the ball into the goal just as everyone else did.

Being in Compassion’s Child Survival program has given Genesis the advantage that she needs too.

Because of the assistance and the hope her mother receives Genesis was given a fair chance at life and now she is a healthy, joyful and thriving little girl today!

Isn’t she just the cutest?!! You can see the joy just radiating out from her and believe me when I say, her joy IS contagious! 🙂

If you would like more information about how you can help mothers and babies like Vanessa and Genesis receive a fair chance, you can visit Compassion’s website by clicking on any of the pictures in this post.

Thanks for reading and have a blessed evening!

Something To Do In Your Free Time

October 22, 20158 Comments

If you have a little free time today and are looking for something to fill it with I have just the thing!

How about watching the movie that I put together of the trip I went on this past September with Compassion?

I know you just can’t wait to watch it 😀 Right?

No????

Well I am just totally shocked! How could you possibly not want to watch my movie? 😉

I once heard a rumor that not many people get overly excited about watching home movies unless they themselves happen to be in the movie, but just in case that’s not true or if it is true and you just happen to change your mind, I went ahead and put it in this blog post 😀

I also heard that the creator of this movie says it is guaranteed to make you smile and maybe even shed a few tears (happy tears of course). So why not go ahead and give it a try? 🙂

I hope you enjoy the movie 🙂

Whether you watched the movie or not I am so glad you stopped by because today I wanted to share something else with you…

While I was in El Salvador we also had the opportunity to visit several of Compassion’s Child Development Projects. On the last day of our trip we visited a child project in the city of San Salvador.

In the area where this project is located gangs are a really big problem and most gangs recruit new members at a very young age. We met a mother who said she feared sending her son to school for fear that the gangs would recruit him. Something else we we learned is that gangs don’t recruit Christians and also the only way a gang will let a person who is a member of the gang get out is if they become a Christian.

These two children are a part of the Compassion center we visited on our last day.

Both of these children are in need of sponsors.

In the video (another reason to watch 😀 ) you will see some of the children baking, playing music, doing hair and also in a computer lab. At this child center children are learning life and job skills such as cooking, music, computers programs, cosmetology, and most important of all they are learning about Jesus.

After our visit to the Compassion project we visited the homes of some of the children. One child’s parent was a former gang member who had left the gang because they were led to Christ due to their child sharing with them what they had learned at the child center about Jesus. Can you believe that?! What an amazing story of how Jesus can change a life!

When you sponsor a child you not only have the opportunity to help change the life of the child you sponsor, but your sponsorship will also affect his or her whole family!

Pretty amazing, huh?

Here is a little information about Luis and Nahomy:

Luis Antonio Ventura Rodriguez – Luis’ birthday is February 7, 2008. He is 7 years old. Luis lives with his mother. His duties at home include helping in the kitchen, running errands and cleaning. There are 2 children in the family. His mother is employed as a farmer. Luis participates in church activities and Bible class. He is also in kindergarten where his performance is average. Soccer, playing with cars and running are his favorite activities.

Nahomy Michelle Garcia Duenas – Her birthday is December 16, 2008. Nahomy makes her home with her father and her mother. Washing clothes, helping in the kitchen and cleaning are her household duties. Her father is employed as a laborer and her mother maintains the home. There are 2 children in the family. Nahomy participates in church activities and Bible class. She is also in kindergarten where her performance is average. Playing with dolls and running are her favorite activities.

Please consider what your sponsorship could mean for Luis or Nahomy and also for their families. It could mean a world of difference and also have an eternal impact.

If you would like more information about sponsoring either of these children you can leave me a message in the comment section below or email me at tluvs2trvl@gmail.com

Have a wonderful day,

Music Monday – Holy Spirit ~ Don’t Hold Back, Be Strong and Courageous, and Bold!

October 12, 20154 Comments

I awakened to the sound of my Lord calling to me, the words, “don’t hold back, be strong and courageous, and bold!” were flowing through my head. A rooster crowed as I pulled the blankets tighter around me, the window had been left open from the night before, allowing not only the sounds of the outdoors to come in, but also the coolness of the morning air.

During my sleep I had forgotten where I was, but it was only an instant before the sleep was lifted to the sound of the rooster crowing once again and once again the words going though my head, ‘don’t hold back, be strong and courageous and bold!‘ and also the realization that I was not in Missouri today.

Today I had awakened in El Salvador.

‘Don’t hold back, be strong and courageous, and bold!’

I had done it and now I was really here right in the middle of where God had called me to be and as I lay there listening to the sounds of nature, the memories of the past two days flooded my mind. Plane rides, a spectacular sunrise, bus rides, new friends, a spirit filled church and new Compassion center ‘Casa de Pan‘ and their leaders Carlos and Candy, a powerful prayer, an afternoon in the home of Elba and Nelson and so much more.

Feelings of joy so filled my heart and a little while later as I went for a walk it struck me that though I was far away from my home in Missouri for some reason I still felt as if I were somehow at home in this place too. Maybe it was because as I walked this morning I knew that I wasn’t ever walking alone because I had Jesus walking along beside me. He had brought me here and now He was showing me the sights, sounds and people of this beautiful place. He was also showing me that no matter where He leads, He will go with me giving me the amazing peace of being at home as I rest in Him.

After my walk as I returned to my room I saw some of the ladies outside on the porch, each of them sitting in their own private presence with the Lord. Suddenly the thought occurred to me that though each lady sat alone, they were not alone at all. It struck me that He was with each individual lady and yet He was still also here with me. Somehow I felt united with them and somehow also a part to their own special time with the Lord, even though it was still private to each one of us in our own individual way.

It also stuck me that we had all came to this place strangers but yet now we were like a family, how is it that I felt comfortable with a bunch of strangers as if I had known them forever? It could only be because we were all sisters in Christ.

When I reached my room, I sat down on the porch and I opened my Bible, it just so happened to open to the page that held this scripture – Romans 1:11-12 I long to see you so that I may impart to you some spiritual gift to make you strong – that is, that you and I may be mutually encouraged by each other’s faith.

When I saw those words suddenly I was reassured of what I had know all along…I knew God had this whole trip planned out and I knew that we were all here because we were each brought here by Him. I also knew that I was prepared because He had prepared me and I knew without a doubt that I was ready to totally dive into whatever God had planned for this day.

‘Don’t hold back, be strong and courageous, and bold!’

This is the day that the Lord has made…I am so glad as I rejoice in it!.

Journal entry 9/14/15

My journal entry made me think of the song by Francesca Battistelli called ‘Holy Spirit’ So today I am sharing it for Music Monday.

There’s nothing worth more that would ever come close,
No thing can compare, You’re our living Hope,
Your presence, Lord.

I’ve tasted and seen of the sweetest of loves,
When my heart becomes free and my shame is undone,
Your presence, Lord.

Holy Spirit You are welcome here,
Come flood this place and fill the atmosphere.
Your glory God is what our hearts long for,
To be overcome by Your presence, Lord.
Your presence Lord

What song moved you this week? Write a blog post about it and then come back here and put your link in below. Have wonderful week!

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Music Monday – ‘Oceans’ ~ Walking on Water in the Presence of My Savior

September 28, 20158 Comments

Good Monday Morning!

I can’t believe its already another Monday morning! It seems as if time sure does seem to be flying soooooo fast anymore! As you know every Monday I try to post a song that moved me during the past week. ‘Try‘ was the magic word in that past sentence because I have totally missed posting the last 2 Music Mondays. I think I may have a very good reason as to why I have missed the last 2 Music Mondays, tell me if you agree 🙂 The first Music Monday I missed because I was in El Salvador and then this past Monday I think my head and heart may have still been in El Salvador.

Since returning home I have had a really hard time getting back into my life here. I can’t really explain it but it’s almost as if some of the things that used to seem important to me now seem somehow a little silly. There were so many things that just touched my heart while I was there in a way that I feel as if I never will forget them, and truthfully I hope I never do forget what I experienced during my trip. Though I don’t want to forget, the problem right now is that many of those things are still whirling in my mind and the processing of those thoughts has been a hard thing for me to do. It just seems like I am getting nowhere fast in the processing. Its not anything bad, its just a lot is on my mind and I feel as if my brain might be on some sort of overload.

I came home from El Salvador wanting to tell everyone right away all about my trip, but yet it’s all so hard to explain. I have journals that are full of notes I’ve written and I have also started about 4 blog posts. I thought by now I would have posted all sorts of stories on my blog but so far I have only posted one story (Unexpected Loan Payback – Day 1 Casa de Pan). Everything is still a jumbled of thoughts in my mind at the moment and it feels as if my thoughts seem almost as if they are too personal to share; but yet I also know that I did not experience all if this to keep quiet about it either. I am pretty sure that at some point with God’s help I will be able pull my thoughts together.

For right now I will share this small tidbit of information from the last day of the trip.

Our last day in El Salvador our van pulled up to a Compassion project and we were met once again by children who were lined up waiting to greet us. They were playing instruments and blowing whistles. By the way…I feel I must mention that who ever had the idea that hundreds of children should all blow whistles all at once inside of a large echoing room must have never heard the sound of hundreds of children blowing whistles all at once inside of an echoing room 😀 I think my ears are still ringing and that is one experience from this trip I will NEVER forget 😀 Even though it was quite painful (just kidding… well maybe not) they were so cute and having so much fun! They were once again another one of those blessings that just seemed to be happening one right after another all week long.

We eventually made our way to the front of the church and as we stood there looking back at the faces of those happy children the song ‘Oceans (Where Feet May Fail)’ by Hillsong United was playing.

“Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders

Let me walk upon the waters

Wherever You would call me

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander

And my faith will be made stronger

In the presence of my Savior”

I had heard the song before but had never heard it in the way as I was hearing it right then. It was the last day of the trip and by then I had already seen God moving in such a big way throughout the whole trip and it was at that moment I realized that God had led me here to this place, and He was right there, right now and I was standing in His presence.

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders...

He had led me to this place

Let me walk upon the waters…

I had walked upon the waters to get here

Wherever You would call me…

He had called me to be right here, right now

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander…

I was deeper than I could ever imagine and knew at that moment If He took me even deeper I would go

And my faith will be made stronger, In the presence of my Savior…

Ya…. ❤ At that moment I stood right there in the middle of the presence of my Savior

I will call upon your name, keep my eyes above the waves, my soul will rest in your embrace, I am yours and you are mine.

Since I have been home it seems like every time I turn on the radio this song is playing and then this morning in church we sang it. Once again I was taken back to standing in that church in El Salvador but this time I realized that though the song reminded me of where I stood a week and a half ago, today I was standing in my own church, and once again He had taken me deeper than I could ever wander and my faith really has been made stronger. As I stood there in the presence of my Savior I called upon his name, He keeps my eyes above the waves, while my soul rests in His embrace, because I truly know I am His and He is mine ❤

Thank you Jesus.

What song moved you this past week?

May God’s peace be with you as you walk with Him into this week,

This is Luis Antonio Ventura Rodriguez.

Luis’ birthday is February 7, 2008. He is 7 years old. Luis lives with his mother. His duties at home include helping in the kitchen, running errands and cleaning. There are 2 children in the family. His mother is employed as a farmer.
As part of Compassion’s ministry, Luis participates in church activities and Bible class. He is also in kindergarten where his performance is average. Soccer, playing with cars and running are his favorite activities.

You may not be able to change the whole world but you can most definitely make a difference in this one child’s life and I can promise you that sponsoring him it will also make a difference in your own life. What have you got to lose?? For about the same price as a cup of coffee each day you can make a difference in Luis’ life, Please consider what that means.
If you would like to know more, you can leave me a message and I will send you more information.

Unexpected Loan Payback ~ Day 1, Casa de Pan

September 24, 201511 Comments

As our van pulled up I noticed there seemed to be a celebration going on. Outside the windows I could see a line of people and suddenly I realized that the celebration was actually the people of the church waiting to greet us! The greeters were all dressed in their Sunday best and they were holding balloons, and had excited smiles of welcome on their faces!

As I got off the bus it felt really strange to me to know this welcome was also for me. I felt so unworthy of all of this hoopla. For some reason to me it just didn’t seem right to have a welcoming so grand that seemed more fit for a celebrity instead of just a bunch of normal ladies from the United States who lived normal everyday lives..

Today we visited ‘Casa de Pan’ which is brand new Compassion project in ‘Eternal Rock of the Century’ church in Caserio Singuil, El Salvador. The people greeting us were Pastor Carlos and his wife Candy, the staff of the project, the congregation, the parents and the children who attend the project. Our group has been busy since May searching for sponsors for the children of this project and now today the moment had finally arrived when we would get to meet the children in person who we have only seen in pictures!

As we stepped out of the van and began making our way to the church, the line of people seemed to be never ending. Mothers and fathers, and their children all saying good morning to each of us as we passed by. Many shook my hand and many hugged or even kissed me. I was a complete stranger yet they were so welcoming and seemed to be genuinely happy to see me. The thought struck me…. “This is what it is to be part of God’s family and these are my brothers and sisters who I am meeting for the first time.” I wish I had the words to explain the feeling I felt, it was such a good feeling and at one point I remember wondering if this is what it will be like when I enter heaven one day? Will my brothers and sisters I haven’t met yet be waiting for me to welcome me into God’s Kingdom in this same way?

Eventually we made our way to the church, but just before I reached the door a little girl met me and gave me a handmade gift and then she walked me to my seat.

She then sat down beside me as the service began and she kept smiling sweetly at me.

Isn’t she beautiful?

The service started with the children singing, “Open the eyes to my heart Lord. Open the eyes to my heart! I want to see you, I want to see you!” And they were singing in English for us!

As I started singing along the words of the song took me back to my journal entry that I had written on the plane yesterday, “Father, Please open my eyes and heart to what you want me to see…’ I found it no coincidence that today the children were singing those very same words. Suddenly I realized I already could see Him in a big big way.

We were told that Pastor Carlos and his wife used to be police officers but they had left their police jobs when God told Carlos to become a pastor. They gave up their old lives and came to this place to start a church. We were also told that at the first service in their new church that they only had 5 people who attended and that those 5 people included their own family! Today the church was packed full with people! I could see God again!

Pastor Carlos had a wonderful message today which came from Proverbs 19:17

“Whoever is kind to the poor lends to the Lord, and he will reward them for what they have done.”

In his message Pastor Carlos talked about how those who are kind to the poor are actually lending to God. I never really thought of that verse in the way He brought it to my attention today. I never really thought of being kind or helping others as if it were ‘Lending’ to God. I guess I always looked at it as if everything that I have already belongs to God and I think I thought more of it as if I were giving those things away more than from a lending type of perspective.

Lending to the Lord was a concept I had never ever thought about.

The service continued and somewhere along the way I got lost in the worship. Though now the songs were being sung in Spanish for some odd reason I felt as if I knew the words, I know this may sound strange but I felt as if the words were on my tongue, and that I knew them. I was moved in a way I have never been moved in church before. Oh how I wish every church service felt that way! I didn’t realize until later in the day what had really happened and how much I had seen God today and in a way I have never seen him before.

As I sat there in that church feeling his blessings filling me to the top the Lending to the Lord concept hit me like a ton of bricks! It was like WOW I think I may have been lending to the Lord all along and now here is my payback, and it is WAY more than I ever gave in the first place. Suddenly it dawned on me how we have to power to help God’s gifts multiply. Not everything we have to give are physical things. Things like. Love, kindness, friendship and our time are all things that can be shared (lent). Today the children had given us the gift of their songs. Their parents had shared their children with us. Pastor Carlos gave his gift of what the lord shared with him in his words. Candy gave in her prayers and the work she had done with the children. We all had different gifts to ‘lend’ and today what we all had lent to the Lord was already being returned back to us as way more than we had lent in the first place.

As I write this It takes me back to 5 years ago…2010….That was the year I ‘loaned’ $38 a month to the Lord. The truth is I never really thought of it as a loan. I just felt the nudge to sponsor a little girl and I never really expected that I would get anything back from that sponsorship… but I did and it was immediate. And as I sat today in a little church in El Salvador I realized that I hadn’t really given anything away at all, it was all a loan and God has been paying me back big time over and over again. The words ‘whoever is kind to the poor lends to the Lord, and he will reward them for what they have done’ make perfect sense to me now..

My heart is so full and I feel blessed and rewarded way beyond anything I ever could have imagined!

To be continued….

P. S. If you would like to lend to the Lord, I brought back a couple of children with me who are in need of sponsors. Meet Heissell Nicolle Cristales Perez and Luis Antonio Ventura Rodriguez. They are both praying for a sponsor, if you feel God nudging you to help make a difference in one or both of their lives leave me a comment and I will email you more information.

Heissell Nicolle Cristales Perez

Luis Antonio Ventura Rodriguez.

And the Answer is…Yes!

September 19, 201511 Comments

So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded.You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised. Hebrews 10:35-36

Hola! As many of you know I was in El Salvador last week with a group of women and Compassion International visiting a new Compassion project ‘Casa de Pan’ and various other projects, with the highlight of the trip being the meeting of my sponsor child ‘Ericka’. This week I plan to share with you a few stories from the trip.

My time in El Salvador was a really fun time that was packed full of God’s love and many, many blessings. I experienced some really hard things this week too, but even though some things were hard, God was still so very good and he was there with us on this trip in a mighty big way. At this moment as I am writing this I still feel as if I am overflowing with a whole lot of stuff and I’m still in the process of sorting through the many thoughts that are swirling around inside of my head.

Getting ready to go.

The time leading up to the trip seemed to be an emotional roller coaster at times. There always seemed to be something trying to get in the way.

Things started with me having some pretty bad knee issues going on and I worried I would not be able to keep up on the trip or that they maybe wouldn’t want me go if I couldn’t keep up. At one point I even told the trip leader that I was not going to be able to go because of the knee issues.

I also I worried I wouldn’t have the funds and also that I may have another trip that could possibly conflict with this one. When I told the trip leader I wasn’t going to be able to go she offered to call me. While on the call she prayed with me and then I continued to stay in prayer as much as possible after our conversation and God just kept telling me to trust that I was supposed to go on this trip. So I kept my answer as a YES and God reassured me time and time again after that, that YES most definitely was the correct answer.

After making the decision that the answer was Yes I got really excited about going but the week right before my trip was a really hard week. It seemed like a whole lot of things kept happening that week that kept getting in the way of my getting ready to go. Things that played on my emotions and left me feeling as if I was not physically or mentally prepared to go.

My dad is very sick right now, so I was worried about leaving him. I feared something would happen to him while I was gone and I would not be here for him or my mother.

I also had some family things going on that affected a child that is close to me and I worried about leaving in the middle of all of the drama that surrounded a situation that seemed to be developing daily with no end in sight.

It was also a busier than normal at work that week and I seemed to have many things that were distracting me from getting my work done and caused me to be at work longer than normal. I kept wondering if I would ever have time to get finished with my packing and also finished with all of the things that I needed to get done around my house before I left.

Another thing that happened and that I think bothered me the most that week was that I had conflict with someone two days before I was supposed to leave. What was said left me feeling very sad and very emotional and I began wondering how well I knew myself and also caused me to start second guessing myself and before I knew it my social anxiety was kicking in again.

If you are a long time reader of my blog or one of my friends or family then you already know that I have this social anxiety issue that rears its ugly head from time to time and leaves me very uncomfortable with people, especially people I don’t know. There have also been times in my life that I have found myself running out of meetings and avoiding social occasions with even those people I do know and are usually comfortable with.

I have never really been a very brave person when it comes to being around other people and now here I was soon to be traveling to an airport I had never ever been in to meet a group of ladies that I had never met except for in an online Facebook group. I was going to be with those ladies all week long and most likely be in very close contact with them all week long too. The last thing I needed was for my social anxiety to kick in.

Though my confidence was shaken up a few times, no matter what happened that week I still knew without a doubt that God’s plan was for me to go on this trip and I was determined I was going to go!

And I did…

My journey started with my husband dropping me off at the airport at 3:30 am and as I confidently walked into the building I talked to God. I remember saying to him, “well God, this is it, you have me now so YOU lead and I will follow.”

And he did.

Everything went smoothly and before I knew it I was sitting on my plane.

As the plane began to taxi down the runway I closed my eyes and continued to pray. As we lifted off I remember thinking ‘there’s no turning back now’ and as I opened my eyes to look out the window I saw that the sun was beginning to rise…

All I had done so far was get on the plane and God was already showing up in a huge way.

How could I see something so beautiful and not know that God was right there beside me?…Actually He was surrounding me at that moment showering me with his amazing love and beautiful gift.

He had told me from the moment he asked me to go, from the moment when I had said yes, and now as I was officially on my way he was telling me once again, that He truly had this whole trip under control. Everything was all going to go according to HIS plan, all I ever had to do was just say yes and and then just show up.

Our trip guide had a place inside to fill out while were were enroute. One of the things we were asked to do was to write a brief prayer to God telling him exaclty how I was feeling right then and ask him to show me what he wanted me to see. So while on my way to Houston to meet my group this is the small prayer that I wrote.

Father I am feeling a little nervous but also really, really excited. I wonder will I fit in with the group, will I be a useful part of all of this? Please open my eyes and heart to what you want me to see. Help me to boldly go where you lead me.

With all my Love,

To be continued…..

Music Monday ~ I Will Follow….to El Salvador!

September 7, 201516 Comments

In less than a week I will be in El Salvador with a group of ladies and Compassion International. While there we will be visiting a brand new child development center and I will also get to meet Ericka who is one of my sponsor children.

I’m soooooooooooooo excited about this new Journey I will be adventuring out on but at the same time I can’t allow myself to think about it too hard because this is something that for me would normally be waaaaaaaaaay out of my comfort zone!

I can barely believe that in just a few short days I will be flying ~~alone~~ … with God … across the country to an airport I’ve never stepped foot in, meeting up with people I’ve never met before and then hopping on another plane and heading off to El Salvador! I have never been your social type of person, I’m awkward around strangers and actually a bit of a loner.

I also know that while I’m there I may see some things that might be hard to see and though I know I won’t want to see those things I also know from past experience that its in the hard places that I tend to see God the most.

It seems like I keep finding myself in these so unlike me sort of settings more and more often here lately and like I said in the beginning I can’t let myself think about it to hard, which is what I just did! I now I have a few butterflies fluttering around in my stomach but I still feel really really excited about going on this journey and I can’t wait to see what God has planned!

All of this excitement is why this week my Music Monday song is ‘I Will Follow’ by Chris Tomlin